The Crazy Alien

When I woke up this morning, I felt an extreme sadness in my heart, remembering this would be the beginning of your last week at work. For a while, I sat still on the bathroom floor and kept wondering how I fell for such a crazy alien. Before I even knew, my night dress was soaked with tears. The more I wiped my tears, the faster they started pouring down my face. I love to cry to lighten my chest, but I never knew tears could be so uncontainable. I wanted to get up and get ready for work, but I just couldn’t stop crying. An aunt of mine, who became blind at a very young age, once told me how she always had to struggle to wade through the empty space in front of her. I realized, I would go through the same trauma until this Friday. Dear Alien, how do I live without you?

Paula, as you said, I am a crazy alien. Humans are not supposed to fall in love with crazy aliens. See, there are six billion other humans around you; if you do not like one, you can always try another. They will understand and share your emotions and you can all get along well. But the aliens are so few and far between that they hardly understand humans, let alone how to relate to humans at the emotional level. They are inherently different; so different that I think they should learn to mind their own business and not ever get emotionally involved with humans. That’s the mistake I made and I know I am paying dearly for it now. You cannot even dream of how I feel to leave you. But I also know how flaky and short-lived human emotions are – I tell you what, two days later, you won’t even remember I existed. To humans: out of sight, out of mind – no exceptions!

Dear Alien, I can’t believe you just said that. Now I know, you truly are heartless. You are right, I am better off with humans only. At least, they won’t make mockery of my honest emotions. You really don’t deserve me.

Paula, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings; I just wanted to lighten up the conversation. I would hate to see you cry like this for five more days. I thought you call me crazy because I have much deeper emotions and sensitivity than the average humans. You have seen how upset I get when you talk to other men. In fact, I told you, my heart freezes to see you with another man. You know, only crazy aliens can behave that way – normal humans don’t. Similarly, when I was with other alien women, I didn’t feel that way at all; actually, I didn’t care if they would run off with others. But with you, it has always been different. All along, I felt a deep sense of connection with you.

Dear Alien, I don’t understand one thing – these last few days, you are supposed to spend more time with me, have lunch and dinner with me every day; instead, you are running around with all the half-known folks from the office. You hardly cared about them all these years. Now, suddenly, they all become important to you? Cancel your lunch date today. I will take you out to lunch. I cannot stand her. Why does she come over to talk to you so many times every day? Worse, she always whispers. I wish I could hear what she says to you. Anyway, I wonder how I will feel when you are not around any longer. The more I think about it, the worse I feel. Lately, I have been crying inside all the time. I have grown so used to being with you all this time. In fact, by sharing the room with you, I know I made it worse for myself. Come to think of it, I should have been an alien too. When I was emotionally involved with the humans, I thought everything was so shallow – superficial talks about some stupid sports, dumb family matters, and of course, all about foods from morning to night. I thought they were more interested in my paycheck and a free lifelong maid service than me, the real person. It was all conditional. I must say, however crazy you are, it has been totally unconditional. If you ever get married, are you going to be as crazy about her? Please don’t answer that. Dear Alien, how do I live without you?

Paula, you are not making things easy for me either. Instead, say something good I will always remember.

We made love! Oh, no! I should not have reminded you that. I know, you will always remember how I look inside. Shame, shame, baby shame! Actually, I love the way you beg me, ‘please, please, please.’

Paula, I am sure, soon you will find someone from your species and eventually get married. If you have a son, name him after me.

I cannot name him ‘Alien.’

Paula, you might have forgotten, but I do have a real name too. By the way, you will make a wonderful mother. I know, your kids will be crazy about you.

So, you are telling me, I won’t be a wonderful wife?

Paula, please don’t. Sorry, sorry, sorry! I was just kidding.

Dear Alien, if you ever see me being happy with another man, you may get a heart attack.

Paula, you have such a poor opinion of my emotional stability. Just don’t marry someone I already know. Sorry, sorry, sorry! I didn’t mean that.

Dear Alien, some aliens do go on to become successful even in this human world. If you ever own a successful company, do you think you will let me run it?

Sure! I have to first hire you as a senior manager and then slowly empower you.

It’s amazing how you fall for anything I ask for. Do you know, I can easily betray you?

You won’t, Paula. You have such a clear heart. You never have any evil thinking. You will never do any harm to anyone.

Dear Alien, close your eyes and give me your right arm. I have to write something that you will always remember.

Paula, you are taking too long. I cannot keep my eyes closed anymore. My arm is hurting too.

Just keep quiet. Your arm is resting on my thigh – think of this as a privilege. Now give me your left arm so I can finish my final lines. Okay, open your eyes now.

“Time Marches on
 But Memory Stays
 Torturing Silently  
                    The Rest of Our Days.”  -Tennyson

Dear Alien, how do I live without you? I wish I was an alien too!